Finding Balance in Healthy Habits: Why Flexibility Beats Rigidity
- Jade Jessica
- Jan 19
- 5 min read
Updated: Jan 28
For many years, I lived an extremely disciplined life, swinging from one end of the pendulum to the other in search of control, results, and structure. I was highly focused on training and nutrition — and while my body reflected that effort, my inner world did not.
Finding balance wasn’t quick or easy. It took years of experience, unraveling, and integration to understand what true alignment actually looks like. That lived experience is what gives weight to what I’m sharing here.
Healthy habits often promise a better life: more energy, less stress, and improved well-being. Yet, sometimes the very routines designed to help us can cause unexpected harm. I recently came across a fascinating case involving a neurologist who worked with a patient struggling with severe anxiety. The patient followed a strict regimen that looked perfect on paper—early morning rise, cold showers, a strict diet with zero sugar, and no rest days. Despite these "ideal" habits, the anxiety persisted.
What happened next was surprising. The neurologist gradually removed the rigid parts of the routine. First, the strict morning rituals were relaxed. Then, the intense exercise discipline was paused. Finally, the patient was allowed to eat without rigid "correct" rules. By day six, the anxiety was gone—not just managed, but completely disappeared. This story highlights a crucial truth: balance and flexibility in healthy habits matter more than rigid perfection.
Why Rigid Healthy Habits Can Backfire
Many people believe that strict routines are the key to success and health. However, rigid habits can create pressure and stress, especially when they leave no room for personal needs or unexpected changes. Here’s why too much rigidity can hurt:
Increased stress and anxiety: When every day must follow a strict plan, small disruptions can cause frustration and worry.
Burnout: Constantly pushing yourself without breaks can lead to physical and mental exhaustion.
Loss of joy: Healthy habits should support happiness, not feel like a punishment or chore.
Reduced adaptability: Life is unpredictable, and rigid routines can make it harder to adjust to new situations.
The neurologist’s case shows that even habits designed to reduce anxiety can increase it if they become too strict.
The Role of Flexibility in Healthy Habits
Flexibility means allowing yourself to adjust habits based on how you feel, your schedule, and your needs. It doesn’t mean abandoning healthy choices but rather making them sustainable and enjoyable. Here’s how flexibility supports better health:
Reduces pressure: Knowing you can adapt your routine lowers stress.
Encourages consistency: Flexible habits are easier to maintain over time.
Supports mental health: Flexibility allows space for rest and self-care.
Improves motivation: When habits feel manageable, you’re more likely to stick with them.
For example, instead of forcing yourself to wake up at 5 a.m. every day, you might aim for a range between 5 and 7 a.m., depending on how you feel. This small adjustment can make a big difference in your overall well-being.
Practical Ways to Build Flexibility into Your Healthy Habits
Here are some actionable tips to create balanced habits that support your health without causing stress:
Set broad goals, not strict rules
Instead of "No sugar ever," try "Limit sugar most days." This allows occasional treats without guilt.
Listen to your body
If you feel tired, take a rest day instead of forcing exercise. Rest is part of health.
Mix routines with spontaneity
Have a basic plan but leave room for changes. For example, if you usually run in the morning but feel like walking, choose what feels best and be mindful of the thoughts that arise if you do this -- do you start to spiral?
Prioritize enjoyment
Choose activities and foods you like. Healthy habits should feel good, not like punishment.
Use habit stacking with flexibility
Attach new habits to existing ones but allow variations. For example, after brushing your teeth, do 5 minutes of stretching or meditation, whichever you prefer that day.
Track progress without judgment
Notice how habits affect your mood and energy, but don’t punish yourself for off days. I love to keep track with a pen and paper -- it helps me stay motivated, and I like visually looking at my progress.
Examples of Balanced Healthy Habits in Action
Diet: Instead of a strict diet cutting out entire food groups, focus on adding more protein and whole foods while allowing occasional indulgences. This approach supports nutrition and enjoyment.
Exercise: Aim for regular movement but vary intensity and type. Some days might be a brisk walk, others a yoga session, and some days complete rest.
Sleep: Maintain a consistent bedtime window but allow flexibility for social events or travel.
Mindfulness: Practice meditation or deep breathing regularly but don’t stress if you miss a session. Even a few minutes on some days can help.
Why Balance Matters for Mental Health
The neurologist’s case highlights that mental health benefits when habits are balanced. Anxiety often worsens when people feel trapped by their routines. Flexibility creates a sense of control and freedom, which reduces anxiety.
Research supports this. Studies show that people who adopt flexible dieting or exercise habits report better mental health and less stress than those with rigid rules. Flexibility helps build resilience, allowing people to cope better with life’s ups and downs.
How to Start Finding Your Balance Today
Reflect on your current habits
Identify which routines feel supportive and which feel stressful.
Make small adjustments
Start by loosening one rigid habit. For example, allow yourself a rest day or a treat.
Notice the effects
Pay attention to how these changes affect your mood and energy.
Build gradually
Add more flexibility over time, creating a routine that fits your life, not the other way around.
Seek support if needed
A coach, therapist, or health professional can help tailor habits to your needs.
Perform a self-audit every 30 days. See what is working and what is not -- and make adjustments as needed. This self-audit is so very helpful and something I encourage my clients to do.
Finding balance in healthy habits means creating routines that support your body and mind without causing stress. Flexibility is not a weakness but a strength that makes habits sustainable and enjoyable. The story of the neurologist and patient reminds us that sometimes less rigid is more—and that true health comes from listening to ourselves and adapting as we grow.
I coach and train men and women seeking more balance, clarity, and resilience in both their inner and outer world. If you’re ready to upgrade your systems and be supported in the process, you can explore my current offerings below.
If you’d like access to my complete beauty and biohacking routines—along with in-depth guidance on the tools I personally use—explore my Beauty & Biohacking Playbook.
With love ~ Jade
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